Waxin’ All Cool

So here I am digging through eBay when I see one of these auctions by sportscard megaseller Kruk Cards. For those too lazy to click, it’s an auction for 700 packs of junk wax from all sports. And, seeing that Jon and I are children of the junk wax era, Icouldn’t pass up the opportunity to live out a childhood dream of being buried alive in packs of ’86-’92 Topps. We set our bid (and our hopes) low and, wonders never cease, actually won one! We were pretty stoked when they came in. In fact, we took pictures! 

Fat packs in a little box

Holy awesome, right? We couldn’t wait to dig in. Look how happy we were! 

Pack Attack!

Totally happy, right? 

Wax'n'Effex!

Oh man we just can’t wait to dig in and sort this stuff out… let’s make piles!

Yeah! Lots of.... 1991 Notre Dame?

Now, if you’ve been following this blog, you know that Jon and I are primarily baseball fans. Jon’s also big into basketball and I’ve enjoyed opening the football boxes we’ve opened to review for you lot, so we figured we couldn’t lose with this huge box of 700 packs. However, while Jon and I are pretty easy going about what sports were represented, it’s safe to say we are not college sports fans. More specifically, we are not fans of college sports played only at one college up to and including 1991. So we were less than stoked to find some 60 or more packs of Notre Dame cards. And another 20 or so Michigan State or whatever cards. So, okay, 15% of these are pretty much worthless. Not a bad ratio, right? I mean, look at all those packs of 1990 Fleer football up there! That pile could have any number of RC second year Deion Sanders, right?! And we only paid about $.10 a pack after shipping so we can absorb that. 

But this picture is not complete, my friends… not complete at all. Because we forgot the most important element… 

$240 worth of pudding.

Pocket schedules? I wish. What you’re looking at there are well over 100 packs of Food Lion Regional Richard Petty cards. You read that right… not only are they Food Lion oddballs… not only are they regional… not only are for a sport that nobody cares about from an era when even fewer people cared about it… but they are also all cards of everyone’s favorite Winston man, Richard Petty. BUT THAT’S NOT ALL! Apparently Food Lion thought it would be a great idea to make this set available in packs of 3 cards. Each racetrack on the tour got its own pack… of the same three cards. That means we have about 40 of the Richard Petty Goes To Richmond! card you’ve been looking for to complete your collection. I’m not joking about how ridiculous these cards are. Check out this auction where a guy is trying to sell a complete set of the boxes of these cards. He has more than 10 of these collections available. If I had any hope that these were anything other than utterly and 100% worthless, it is now dashed. I don’t know why Jon wouldn’t let me just throw these away. 

Okay, so something like 40% of this lot is without any value. I guess the point is DON’T BUY ONE OF THESE LOTS. You’re way better off paying that $9 for a box of ’92 Donruss. At least you’ll get a sweet Diamond King! 

But it wasn’t all for naught. We had an idea for our first ever contest (that I also teased earlier this week) that involves the paltry stack of baseball packs we got in this lot. Stay tuned for that, but I’m curious if anyone else has had any luck with lots like this… I feel like Kramer and Newman in that episode of Seinfeld where they’re convinced there’s a way to scam the bottle deposit system in Michigan… there’s just got to be a way!

8 comments to Waxin’ All Cool

  • I’m scared to buy lots, just because of this. I don’t need stuff like that in my house.

    Oh, by all means, throw away the auto racing crap. No baseball card deserves the dumpster, but I wouldn’t hesitate with all those Pettys.

  • I like oddball sets and even I would toss the Pettys.

    That sounded dirty.

  • $240 worth of pudding?

    Put those packs in a pile, I’d like to dip my balls in them!

  • Gary

    Awesome pics of sheer jubilation on both your parts.

    Your experience reminded me of Don West on the Shop at Home Network screaming at me, “DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT THIS…GET ON THE PHONE NOW AND ORDER THESE CARDS!!!” at two in the morning after regular programming went off the air. I never had the nerve to pull the trigger and buy anything, but I was always tempted when he and Kenny Golding showed me what I “could” get in my purchase.

    Curious if you guys or any of the loyal readers ever purchased any cards (or beanie babies, knives, etc.) from the boys at SHN? Maybe Matt F. even dipped his balls in some? Hopefully not the knives.

  • I got dibs on all the Rick Mirer cards in those Upper Deck packs. That’s right bitches, all 80 of them. Need to stock up on bip ammo for next season.

  • dammit. I meant to say Notre Dame packs, not Upper Deck packs. Less beers I should drink.

    • You can have all the cards in all of the packs as far as I’m concerned!

      Also, two State references in on commnet… I think that deserves a prize of some sweet UCLA cards! No? How about some Kayo Boxing cards?

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